if being creepy is wrong, then i don't want to be right
Just asked what her favorite part of a guys body is. She said ballsack. I'm in love.
windsor, ontario is like a poor man's amsterdam
no, it is just poor
You handed some guy a spoon you found, he yelled SPOON GAME, and then the two of you spent the next 20 minutes throwing spoons all over the kitchen.
I don't understand but I fell asleep naked holding a tub of cool whip and a boiled egg
I ended up with a bullet proof vest and I still don't know his last name.
She just rubbed her face all over pool chalk. I feel like it's time to go
Um. That's my cat Laura. You put my cat in your mouth, and then you put my cat in your purse.
Just drank an entire bottle of champagne for lunch. It's gonna be that kind of semester.
So, your gf couldn't walk up the stairs without your help, but she could knit you a scarf?
I think the fact that the scarf was made out of dental floss should be taken into account.
We were dancing and she was clawing my stomach like a fat kid getting to a half broken pinata.
They have a booking log online so i can just check that instead of call
Technology: making bailing your sister out easier since 2008
I'm waiting at the bar and am surrounded by unattractive women.
You need to get here and rebalance this disturbance in the force.
Molly was fun. I was in a captain planet onesie in Wal-Mart talking to everyone haha
I gave him a blowjob to kill bill. 2 of my favorite things.
Randomize
