Is it weird that I have contacts who i've classified as DO NOT ANSWER?
Lol no its called college
you'd think he'd be slightly more humble with a penis that small
Dude I just heard my boss singing from the bathroom "I love making poop"
you kept lying down on the floor at the bar just to prove you could get back up
Come 10 years my vagina won't look like this. I must cherish it
She said "Lay the fuck down and ill show you how its done. Ill get us both off." I did. And she did. Best words ever said before sex.
Ryab! Make hr wtop. Mshe make sme speee. I don want to pee. I want sev. He was so igbad. Redpo.
yep you were here saturday. if you woke up smelling like vanilla i can explain.
I was desperately holding on to my sandwich while we had sex.
michael burned off one of his eyebrows making a pizza so he had to shave off the other one to make it look even. it doesn't look right, but I'd still bang him.
Her vagina was like a painting you can put your face in.
for real. if he messaged me that i'd have made his penis cower in a corner.
It was all good until his cat started licking my nipple along with him
She meowed at me. Repeatedly. Then she asked what was wrong with me because I didn't understand her.
how does that bad decision feel?
Randomize
