he fingered my asshole thinking it was my vag...I couldn't bring myself to tell him, mostly from shame for me and pity for him
I just went to a subway where the girl didn't know how to make a blt. I will not miss public school texans.
Semi hypothetical question. Do you think its physically possible to bruise your clit?
I went to the gas station and the lady goes I remember you. Broken sunglasses and puke on your car.
Its official. Girls from Indiana do not give rim jobs.
if I could send you my dick right now I would. that's how good of a friend I am.
I feel like an ass. I'm not blacking out ever again. I want to clean your feet for a year. Just like Jesus did.
I have a way to get him back. you're going to have to take one for the team and make a visit to the health department. you in?
I've never had goosebumps on my dick before. It was definitely not a bad feeling.
Almost to work. And still feel hungover. Like my body is trying to regenerate after dying. Full on zombie shit. But like, one of those zombies from warm bodies that comes back to life slowly.
If, when you wake up, you're wondering why you're in the bathtub, it's because when I tried to move you, you yelled that that was cheating and tried to kick me in the face.
Fair enough.
I just stood beside an Amish man and bought Cocoa Krispies and tampons.
I've pulled 4 ticks off of me. This is the last time I suck dick in the wild.
This is why you arnt allowed in pet stores
Last night I drank three beers and threw up in a tree house. I am ashamed.
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