its great to know that you distinguish your relationships on whether you can cum on someone's face
votings over. no more wacking it to anti christine o'donnell ads
Nobody knew what to do when it was dead. You said fire up the George Foreman, I've never ate baby shark. She hasn't stopped crying.
Post-sex chicken soup was such a good idea. It's been like an hour and I'm still applauding myself
Doubtful. That seems irresponsible. The 4th will kill you if you stopped drinking until then. Let's think logically.
Got some good news and bad news about the hayride this weekend.
The good news is its still on, the bad news is we don't have any hay. The best news, if you drink enough you won't give a fuck that its just a trailer.
I knew it would get worse when I said I think your roommate is watching and he looked over at him and said ... So?
Dude, all I know is that I came out of this thing wearing a snorkel mask and completely covered in glitter and soap.
"DO YOU LIKE FLYING KITES" WORKED AS A PICKUP LINE. SUCK IT.
I just want to get drunk and wake up on Wednesday
If I send you a picture of a dick will you give me your honest reaction?
So let me get this straight I was getting drunk with our science teacher from high school and you got drunk with an 82 year old woman who invited you back to her house and made you sandwiches.
Yes.
Had sex outside for the third time last night. Mosquito bites all over my ass, and i think i have a rash on my nipples. When will i learn.
Just wait till winter
just saw a kid waiting at the door of the stairs for the elevator. there is no elevator in this building. get on his level.
All i want from a relationship is to get drunk watch pirates of the Caribbean and have sex
Randomize
