They have to be talking about me. I never heard that statement until I was born.
Alex texted me. Bootycall boy #2. its like an alarm goes off once i'm single that the line is open again
dude smells like cheese burgers and loose women...... i want his life
Who the hell brings a 6pack to a party. I'm trying to make mistakes.
Canada just beat USA, the sad part they still need us to make money so who really won
did i really just refer to you as "the mid season replacement"
There is a mirror in the headboard of the bed that I'm sleeping in so I can immediately question life choices when I wake up.
They showed a guy on tv in a Brady jersey and a sweatpants boner when the NE offense took the field. They didn't show his face. I hope that wasn't you.
We were escorted through the guys dorm by 5 kids with nerf guns and zelda shields. I felt like the president with a fucked up secret service squad.
Meet at Walmart straight from work to buy items for hurricane fun. Then blast some wine, make some sex, blast a bowl and cuddle each other till the sun comes up?
That's the most romantic New Orleans hurrication I've ever heard of. Can I have your babies?
As I was about to fuck him, he requested a moment of silence for Leonard Nimoy.
ayo
its like you know when i get waxed
I've had way too many dicks in my mouth the past two weeks. Ready to go back to school and be a doctor now
My face is going numb. I think it's time I call it quits
oh.. my GOD my dad just text me... "i need a naked women" ........... help?
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