they were just spraying pledge on themselves and calling it lemon cologne.
almost just walked around my whole building with my bowl in my hand before i remembered 420 isnt a get out of jail free card
I think I may have appendicitis, but the house is like two blocks from the hospital so I'm just gonna go and drink anyway.
What are the odds of finding the one hot Australian dude with erecile dysfunction?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just found a 2 minute video on my phone of you throwing up in a fake plant.
Dont make this weird.... I was wondering if I could paper mache a few of your dildos this weekend?
Nothing says "welcome to Denver" like a hot 18 year old giving you directions to the dispensary and ending up blowing you in the backseat
ANNA HAS DISCOVERED EROTIC FANFICTION OF SHARKNADO THIS IS NOT A DRILL
If I'm going to risk life and limb to wear a Wings jersey to the Garden next week, the least they can do is win.
And the most would be ending up in bed with one of them.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This whole pope visit thing is ruining me having sex.
Dude, you were so drunk you were hanging from the ceiling of my car pretending you were a sloth while we were on 81.
HE CHOSE A RESTAURANT AND MADE A FUCKING RESERVATION. I AM SHOOK
come pick your gf up from my house. she's sitting in the fridge and hissing at the cat to let her eat the potatoes. btw i dont have a cat
There's a lady rapping at me about making healthy food choices. She lives in a refrigerator. This is not okay with me
cinco de mayo stole my toenail
cinco de mayo stole my virginity.
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