I'm wearing a childsize birthday hat and a bib. I am the def of sex appeal rite now
i'm not even sure i have knees anymore. that awesome.
Nothing is better than seeing someone you fucked go to the Olympics. I feel so American.
that's all we do, eat and hve sex, eat and have sex. he thinks it's bad and that we need to talk more or whatever but I'm just not seeing the problem...
YOU'RE CHANGING THE SUBJECT. I CAN BLOW SOMETHING UP OR I CAN TELL HIM YOU LOVE HIM, BUT ONE OF THE TWO IS BOUND TO HAPPEN
Standing here wondering if its a good idea to cook pork chops in the toaster or not.
WTF? Why is there a pic of my tits in ur dad's office?
no body wants to do anything today cause it's too cold, but a guy can only masturbate so many times a day. Ya know
for some reason leaving your socks onmakes it less meaningful.
When I was sick she came over with Call of Duty, animal crackers and a handjob. Honor says I can't dump her until Easter
As I was about to fuck him, he requested a moment of silence for Leonard Nimoy.
So here's a tip: don't give a blowjob the same morning you're going to the dentist. Cuz they will think you have "mouth trauma."
Do not take the D yet, he needs to be worth it. Your Vagina is GOLD.
He obv doesn't know that telling a woman to chill will get him murdered
So naked ping pong was a mistake... Looks like we were attacked by an octopus.
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