I pretty much can't stop smiling when I talk to you. Even when you talk about disease and infectious diarrhea.
Its 11am everyones wasted wearing sombreros and eating fresh produce..cesar chavez would be very proud
It was scary, we all screamed. Never make mimosas in a car.
We role played last night. I was Brandon Inge and she was some slut from Toledo. Let's just say Triple A might not be so disappointing after all.
Found our threesome girl. She says I'm pretty. She doesn't know I'm pregnant. Yet. Think we can pull it off?
I think he's in need of mouth to penis resuscitation. Which I happen to be certified
If it makes you feel any better, karma just served me up a big dose of fuck you.
You made me pull over because you thought a leaf was a twenty rolling across the road.
Whoever put the rooster in the elevator is my fucking hero. Who even thinks of that shit?
George disappeared two hours ago with a stripper named "delicious." Haven't seen him since
I wanted to buy shoes but nothing fit. So i'm getting a vibrator.
Let's go buy marshmallows and play chubby bunny until we feel alive again
The cat ate a weed mint. This is not a drill
i'd like to schedule a penis for 4pm please.
Working from home has been great for my sex life! A few of my neighbors are in open marriages and several more wish they were!!!
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