Will you still be my friend if I read and enjoyed Twilight?
No
Dude, the girl next to me just farted. Worst part, it smells like astroglide
NO FUCKING WAY. PLEASE MAKE HER IMPLANT THAT POOR KID INTO A RESPONSIBLE UTERUS.
I doubt the Taliban would support fake nipples.
All I could understand from his text was "hatchet" "soccer" & "bitch". its safe to say andy has had enough to drink & will be violent soon
I remember seeing LSAT prep books and thinking "Whose room is this? I should be hooking up with them instead."
I have a boner and a quesadilla why aren't you here
I have no idea. But that is beside the point bc in vegas I'm a pro vball player from Ireland and a veterinarian on the weekends
I think I ruined his life by managing to get his initiation nickname for his frat to be "Whiskey Dick" but I still wish herpes on him and his fugly new girlfriend.
Oh fuck, I messaged a Jack Kerouac poem to a girl I'm trying to sleep with last night at 4am.
My guy issues hinge on tonight's game. Caps win, it's Dustin. Rangers win, Josh. I even flipped a coin to see who got what team
Fuck I think I want to but I don't think I should. Caught between should and wanting.
just follow your vagina
Quote of the day.
Is it bad that whip cream tastes like sex to me?
well that was a fail
maybe for you, but i got a free ice cube in my bra
I have a lot of money, and no morals. shots on you when you get here.
Randomize
