Just waterfalled in the movie theatre... this is the beginning to a good night
You were eating microwaved pad thai out of a solo cup with a pair of scissors....
On a lighter note, the guy I gave a lap dance to then fell asleep on his crotch just facebook friend requested me..
Then she cat effected the picture of my dick I sent her the other night. I'm in love.
Then again, I'm single and napping with a stuffed yoda doll...so I'm not the world's authority on shit.
I just totok an inventory of my purse: 1 apple, 1 pair of underwear, 7 condoms, $18 in ones, a check with "for sexual healing" in the subject line, and a 4 oz bottle of wine.
Oh! and a letter from a judge saying I got an interview. Cause that balances it out.
Well, my breasts are swollen and I cried about the Iditarod. But I say PMS until proven pregnant.
Some nice lady just gave me a beer out of her purse. I love youth hockey
Can you bring me some underwear? I feel uncomfortable going underwear less at a Remembrance Day ceremony.
That's why i need nudes. Plutonic nudes.
Interesting, I was always told to run away from crazy, but you seem to think we should run towards them dick first.
she was sitting with her tits completely out.. on the kitchen floor..eating pickles by the handful... rapping mac dre... and then lit up a cig and continued...that drunk
When was the last time you got laid?
When was the last time you came home sober?
touche
We just started our own DARE program: Drugs are really enjoyable.
I knew she was the one when we had sex to the halo soundtrack.
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