How do you know one of your one night stands hasn't produced a child? You may have hundreds of kids.
Pretty sure I don't. One night stands are purely anal..no exceptions.
He DELETED brick breaker off his blackberry why even bother trying to find something in common?
Professor took us out for drinks. She said if I ordered the 64oz "Call a Cab," she'd give me an A. I drank it in 5 minutes. A+?
Getting blown during the Cavs game doesn't make it any less depressing.
it's like his penis is God's way of saying "sorry about his face"
hes like my own personal sex toy i use him on the weekends and then i have the option to put him away all week
I don't know. I was hiding and the bed was banging. I am going to sleep now in someone's car.
my vagina is starting to think like a penis, and I'm not even slightly worried
They just built a gym in the same parking lot as my favorite bar. Drunk me is gonna be so excited.
I was a little curious what "unspeakable" things he could possibly do to my feet
This is the third time this year I've whored myself for a Netflix login. If this guy changes his password, I'm gonna fucking give up.
Or maybe pay for Netflix?
I'm not that desperate yet.
Yeah that stuff was rough. We insisted on wearing our bikinis all down college ave, and at several parties that were not beach themed
why is there glitter IN my vagina????
Remind me later when I want to buy more drinks that there's a 20 in my bra
Watching a guy pay his tab with a check. Jesus dude...
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