Do you think red sox nation has an official powerpoint template/memo format for resignations of manny support, bandwagon applications, and other official business?
those are such fre$h shoes
going to ignore the use of the word "fresh" in a sentence that isnt related to produce and/or other food stuffs and especially the part where you replaced an "s" with a dollar sign
Just found out that I was singing john legend songs as I threw up last night. Quality.
I should be nowhere even remotely near facebook in this condition.
You're asking the wrong person. I was drunk on nyquil and jager.
I had something called a trashcan. Never again. I almost fucked chewbacca.
People are yelling about how much they want you here.
I'm going to change, vomit up my mexican food to save the trouble later, and then come meet you. Thrilled.
The ONE weekend I don't put anything up my nose, and it decides to bleed like crazy
I almost went home with him but then my hydroxycut fell out of my purse at the bar and I ran away
I'm using my ex bfs phone number to look up his Kroger card so I can get a discount on condoms...yep this is my life
My roommate told me he found me naked in the shower puking and when he asked why I was naked I said "you can't wear clothes in a shower"
I'm wearing a sports bra. Of course I'm not getting laid tonight.
You are talking to me during sexting hours. Be careful, innuendos are taken seriously
just saw those girls we met the other night. i happen to be wearing a bunny suit and driving your smart car. i think its safe to say thats a no go situation.
whatever, tonight I’ll be getting my ass eaten by an aussie so we good
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