I lost my shoes and bra and was beyond mapquesting
im drinking this country out of the recession.
he asked me out through an event invitation on facebook, the title read Romantic Dinner For 2
Circumcision scars are like fingerprints. I think I'm on to something man.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i wasn't gonna shower then i remembered i slept in my own piss
Bone him for me, BONE HIM TWICE FOR ME.
Whoever put salsa in the kiddie pool.....your an ass. Fuck you.
The stock is going waaaaay up on that picture of my pussy with a bowtie on it.
A boy in some branch of the military kissed me I think I'm going through an American sniper phase
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Fireball goes down like mother's milk. Btw your housemate is naked
I'm the only person I know who could have actual sex and then dream about my vibrator.
he told me that he only likes small dogs. I should have known he was going to end up being little bitch.
this is the second day the intern has gotten me coffee. he either wants to bang me or thinks I'm more important than I am.
either way he's in for disappointment
i just has to use a gift card to Target that one of my students parents got me to buy Plan B bc my bank account is -$0.08 so my 2017 is starting exactly how i pictured.
I will bring Jesus to court if he punishes me for that
Randomize