she looks like someone took a bunch of spare parts and glued them all on one face. it's quite horrifying.
did you hook up at the wedding?
No but I jerked off on the hotel sheets. I wanted to get my moneys worth.
I need a booty call who doesn't know my boyfriend or my friends.
You pointed at his crotch then made a thrusting motion. I think it's safe to say every guy at my college loves you.
Just found a hole in my wall with your left shoe in it.
he walked out as i was licking snow off of his car...
Haha...we lost by one cup to a guy w shitty facial hair. What makes me most mad abt the loss is that I could grow a better beard on my vag.
Hey, who is this? Sorry, you're in my phone as "you better remember".
He always takes home straight guys. He plays One Night Stand on Ledgendary Mode
Do you think it's safe to mix miralax with a tequila sunrise?
Yeah. Still not happy that my prof saw a picture of my vag.
lol I'll trade you jello for a tampon
what a trade!
He called me khaleesi while I rode his dick. He wins
i'm not so sure everythign we did last night was legal...
U were so upset when the shower ruined ur nachos. I didn't kno what to do.
Randomize
