You're my little dorito
small problem..I have a major exam in the morning so I might have to go to the library after the party
so no drinking for you?
don't be silly
can we please take bets on how much therapy you'll need in the future?
Your excuse of not making us Mac and cheese was that you couldn't find 6 cups of water...
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you were passed out snoring, face down with all your clothes still on and 20 minutes later you sat up and said "FUCK YES" and then passed out again.
You offered me some of your "Jungle Juice." It was just 151 and Absinthe. I don't know how you are still alive.
Just drank an entire bottle of champagne for lunch. It's gonna be that kind of semester.
Oh thank the gods of upholstery, i thought that was never coming out...
Ugh I can't even look at alcohol this weekend, my body needs to heal.
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We have your weave and dirt in our room.
Ryan friended me on LinkedIn and it took everything in my power not to endorse him for sexual dysfunction as a skill.
He couldn't get his dick hard. So he started yelling at it. " EVERYONE is laughing at you, you piece of shit no wonder you can't get pussy" i wonder if that happens frequently I'll try again next weekend
You rinsed the beer pong ball off in my White Russian
dave might be using McDoubles to pay for dances
he has gotten at least 7 lap dances out back
She's like a squirrel. She spazzes out all the time.
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