your drunk exhusband is tryin to get with my drunk exgirlfriend. i think its funny. if you still talk to him dont say anything.
we're not divorced.
How many pudding cups do I have to eat for it to count as dinner?
4.
seriously this is one of those moments where im glad i dont really talk to or know the people i sleep with
Well said.
Do you think there are girls out there that really do like small penis?
im pretty sure one of the guys i was dancing with at graffiti wrote on my back "you rock". now feel like a danced with a 5 year old.
Just shaved my vagina. It's been so long I forgot what it looked like. You need to come over right now.
Today in class was pretty awsome. I dont feel like i have to throw up and im actually paying attention. This is a first for friday
Listen, i'm watching playoff hockey and eating waffles. i just don't have time for your drama today.
I just saw someone EAT a flashcard out of frustration. Finals suck.
I spent most of the night convinced it was my birthday. But I was probably wrong, it can't be January, can it? I'm 90% sure its not. But maybe. The days have got shorter. Is this what unemployment feels like to everyone?
It was about the point the universe collapsed in on itself and I was a singularity of insanity that I realized I was tripping balls.
As we have told you before, the first rule of hook-up bingo is we don't talk about hook-up bingo
And your boyfriend doesn't mind you constantly taking pictures of his dick just to freak out your brother?
its more like he's accepted that he can't stop me
And pointless. I'm fully vested in all my calories coming from booze today. The salad just fucks that shit up
HER BOYFRIEND CAME HOME WHILE WE WERE GETTING IT ON IN THE SHOWER
At least you smelled nice while he kicked your ass.
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