What should our trivia night team be named?
Define Statutory
He went through and tagged himself on my crotch in all of my facebook pics
im holly from the hills drunk
Drinking bud light and eating rice cakes...this is the closest to getting in shape for spring break as its going to get.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Is it bad that John just came to my work to have sex with me bc I felt bad that he slept on his porch last night locked out and I missed all his calls?
If i evwr doyble fist jack daniels and smirnoff again, i hereby give you permission to take them both away grom me and give me and give me a glass of wat
the condom is still stuck, that's what I get for being responsible
So I'm drunk playing pool in a bar with a guy I arrested last week for a DUI...if he recognizes me, shit's gonna get real.
I'll give you $10 to get a dick pic with a gecko on it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can't believe I had to sit there pretending to play Halo with a condom on for 20 Minutes because your brother barged in to tell a story.
Either im tripping real hard, or there's a legit land shark in my apartment.
I don't understand or I understand perfect - if were not talking about fried chicken I'm not sure what's happening.
I just drove my booty call to his booty call, if that isn't spreading the love, I don't know what is.
I just googled: how soon can I pee on a stick. What is my life coming to.
If there's one thing I think I could really excel it, it's curating a midlife crisis
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