It doesn't matter if they shave you or not, you're still susceptible to the staph infection.
She is sleeping in a dress because she's too drunk to put "real clothes" on
It's almost like sex with her has gotten boring... like it's still good, but the creativity is lacking... it's times like these that i wish she still wanted me to gag her
I think I'm going to wait until after Halloween to call off the wedding. No need to ruin my favorite holiday.
I'm taking it from the chunk of pizza I just pulled out my hair that we ate pizza last night?
Im the proud new owner of the campus speed bump sign
After Madison dropped a bottle of full vodka an it shattered on the floor, it was quiet for literally 3 min straight and then drew said "the booze gods have spoken"
I've decided I'm going to drink again. More. Day drinking. Night drinking. Everything. It's the responsible thing to do since I'm not pregnant
Is it possible to rally from a drunken seizure?
she had a dildo shaped like a dolphin. she will forever be known as Flipper
It's getting harder and harder to fake orgasms as I get older.
I used an explanation of Walking Marriages in the Mosuo Culture to successfully negotiate an open relationship. That Anthropology degree is finally starting to pay off.
Apparently I drunkenly agreed to help the homeless. For once, I'm not disappointed in drunk me. Four for you, drunk self. You go, drunk self!
Well, that's not my fault. I make decisions all the time when I'm drunk.
It got weird I got a phone call while looking at porn and the video started playing while on the phone full on porn audio.
Randomize
