It's like God shit irony all over that family
just saw ex-bf. should he be more embarrassed to be a college dropout working at rite aid or should i be because i was buying newports and rembrant?
tie
What. The. Fuck. No, you will not spank me.
That wasn't intended for you, my bad.
Just had a drunken guest at my hotel threaten to "throw a fuckin fireball at my face"
I wasn't interested in him...but then he played The Office theme song on acoustic guitar. I'm sorry.
we turned his baptism video into a drinking game
At this point I feel like i'm never going to be sober, and it's frightening
She looks like a junkie muppet...awful
This essay is so getting done. I am spurred on by thoughts of test-driving your newly shaven face by sitting on it as soon as humanly possible.
Remember when we saw my neighbor taking dick pics of himself? He's back at it!
Adults smoke weed in footie pajamas man. You just gotta accept me for who I am.
Then he shook the next streetlight but this one broke and fell over. He told me, "This is the part where we run."
he brought with him gifts of cookie dough and penis. upgrading our relationship from fwb's to bf/gf was an incredibly smart merger.
Does this mean I have to put a bra on now
she kind of stumbled up and said "Bitches be needin' stiches." i thought i could convince her to break a bottle over someones head but she fell onto her face and passed out before i could say anything
Randomize