I vomited in the sink and my bra was in there...I don't even have words to describe this hangover confusion
some drunk guy just paid $3 for each cig that i picked up off the ground. the cigs that he threw on the ground. I might just follow him the rest of the night
My fingers feel amazing. Their going like 100 MPH!!
HOLY SHIT. SHIT THAT IS HOLY. HOLY OF THE SHIT.
The thumbs up barstamp on my hand is mocking my hangover with its positivity.
Well it was tamer than the 4th of july when I blew that guy I met walking home from the fireworks
They better not charge my debit card for what you peed on.
She followed me back, then proceeded to find my room, get her panda suit on? And then raid my room and pass out on my couch... what the fack do I do now?!?!
You were so drunk you coat checked your shoe... Not even both of them. Just one shoe.
Just go read my twitter... There's a play by play. It starts with a penis pump
I never thought the most recent texts on my phone would be with ASAP ferg and my ex...
he just cleaned his wound with pinnacle whipped
If everything else in my life fails, at least I just had one of my top orgasms
Why is there a mildly painful bruise on my back?
You slipped off the sink last night.
Why was I on the sink......?
;)
Last night this creepy guy asked me my name and I told him it was Jaundice and he called me that all night
Hurry I'm alone dressed like a prostitute eating French fries.
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