I enjoy that i have a whole shelf of clothes that I've accumulated from random sex. You know the ones you get to make the morning after look less awkward like similar to an athletes trophy shelf
Admittedly I was a little ambitious with some of the positions but you walked in during the worst of it.
either way he was missing a nipple.
He wouldnt stop screaming that he wanted a trashcan WITH a lid. Whats so necassary about a lid
You screamed at all of us and then showed us your sack. You're like the boyfriend of my dreams.
Bering your kids um. Abiout tol. Throw up
Even the paramedic said "what a way to kill a party"
I'm at a winery and there's a 50 yr old woman sitting at a table alone with a bottle of wine and the only time I've seen her get up is to harass the hot dog guy
So we became Pizza Strippers- we stripped and asked for slices of pizza in return.
He came in two seconds and stole my pizza so I'm not counting it.
Was so high at one point last night that while showering I was worried that using too much hot water would slow down our Internet.
Checked my bank account this morning...apparently I went to 7-11 at 4am and spent $22 on taquitos. New all time low for me.
I ate all of them. New all time low for ME.
Hey, thanks for helping me this morning
Always a pleasure to feed you bread as your body lay crumpled on the floor.
That girl is like a master class on how to be an unlovable crazy person.
Don’t eat the Doritos. Jeff was eating them while he was watching porn
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