a chick just tried to cover her fart by sneezing. it didn't work
Waldo just asked us for directions. Even he doesn't know where he is.
i just googled "who won the civil war" . how can i still have a 97% in this class?
just saw 2 fat kids fight for the last slice of pizza. Litteraly fight. God Bless America
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
there's a picture of him beating off in the library with a cowboy hat. please steer clear of this one if you ever want to be respected.
How do i tell my boyfriend " I'm taking the two weeks im in Europe to fuck my way across 9 countries" in a way where we will still be together?
He just asked me to pee through my panties while he watched. I might need more tequila for this one.
I always have trouble explaining my life decisions to people over the age of 30.
I just found a plastic cup with panties inside of it. Let's play CSI.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I seriously think I got run over last night.. My sides are bruised and I got a ride home in the limo from the office.
Kyle's mobile fuck service..... Kinda has a nice ring to it don't you think??
woke up in a random sweater in a random bed in a random house on a street I don't recognize..
also, I vaguely remember swapping shirts with some random guy on the dance floor.
It's statistically impossible for there not to be at least one guy sexting you right now
My bail money is reserved for people I either A, think were in the right, or B, have an awesome story that leads up to needing it. Just remember that before you call me.
i refuse to sex anyone who doesn't get my lord of the rings references. no exceptions.
Randomize