he cried for an hour, then he threw up on my lap then started singing party in the usa...opera style...
man i wonder what i would be like if i had never started smoking weed
how do i say, "my ex is going to be at this party so don't look like shit" without sounding like a bitch?
the only time i'm productive on weed is when i drink.
There are bud lights poping out of the zipper of my overnight bag and my dildo almost fell out in the elevator. not professional
we managed to turn Dream Phone into a drinking game. don't hate.
i will see naked twins by the end of the night. that's all i know
Of course I'm hard in the pics. If there's a chance that these pictures will cause a scandal later in my life I at least want my dick to look it's biggest
Dude how did you get resin on my keyboard?
U offered to motor boat her and it somehow turned into u two going on a sunset cruise in Newport. At 3am.
Rumble strips road head = magical
It's like if you wanna bond just do a ropes course or have group sex you don't have to be weird about it
i think ive been high everyday since ive met you
They think I fractured my spine while doing your cousin on concrete.
My husband found the cock ring I bought my FWB. I told him it was napkin holder and he believed me. And that’s why I need a side dick
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