wake up i wanna do it froggy style
I just love slightly exposed cleavage. Not too much to be whory but just enough to say "your kids will never go hungry"
the last 2 times weve had drunk sex ive had to get the morning after pill.. he's turning into a real expensive fuck buddy.
the more i look through evidence of last night, the less i seem to remember.
He came in both my eyes, then refused to give me a towel unless I found him by playing Marco Polo
Rather than admit to myself he's hooking up with her right now, I choose to believe that he's not responding because he's masturbating to my picture, distraught over his poor choice, and trying to forget about the one that got away with a heavy dose of meth.
I just think that exercising will really get in the way of my painkiller induced nap time rituals. There's gotta be a better way.
Can we be in one of those super weird relationships where you carry me around everywhere?
I swear to all that is holy, next time you get my mom high with your "special bake sale" I am going to put your dick in the blender.
Remember when you fed me goldfish while I was -inside- of someone?
There is a guy here calling himself the pants less weed fairy
The Uber driver took us to a Waffle House. We didn't even say anything when we got in. MAGIC.
Woke up with a lip tattoo that says "fake news" in case you're wondering about my wellbeing
Where do you think black out memories go?
Into the dark abysmal abyss of the deepest, darkest part of your mind. It's obviously the bodies natural defense to protect you from witnessing the shit you do while actually blacked out.
Today I saw someone riding a horse on the sidewalk by aldi when I went to walmart. Old town road was playing on the radio. It was perfect.
Randomize
