We all know the best way to start a relationship is greeting while at least one of you are intoxicated, dual facebook stalking, and a two week long game of 20 questions via texts to 'really' get to know each other. In that order.
I wouldn't have it any other way. It's like a fairy tale!
Helping high family members not look retarded is what family is for
So my game is weak??
If your game is "Lets have sex, and maybe pizza" then yes.
Just took the worst coed shower ever. We both cried. AND I only shaved one leg.
People are yelling about how much they want you here.
I'm going to change, vomit up my mexican food to save the trouble later, and then come meet you. Thrilled.
I know how to say Yes, No, and Your Mother's Vagina. So almost fluent.
The cops busted down the door and everyone ran. I was just trying to find my shirt before I got arrested
We got Pizza Hut & Papa Johns, delivered within seconds of each other, and both delivery people did a shot. I was put on Earth for this moment.
Getting your clit pierced is not something you want to trust to a crazy girl with an ice cube, some vodka, and a sewing needle. Trust me. I learned that the hard way.
Being able to fart in my own house is like 90% of why I pay rent
purchased gas station taquitos and condoms at 4 this morning. It has been magical..
We watched ESPN, hooked up, got waffles. You know, a typical weekend.
i wish i could put you in a lil box, and keep you for when i need to be blown
I can't talk, I can't walk, I think I'm twitching and I'm not even sure if I'm typing this. Help
i just realized i have only had sex on couches so far this year. i can't decide if that's impressive or trashy
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