Dibs on passing out in front of the toilet.
It was an awkward 3some. I took her from behind while he just made out with her.
There's a difference between southern and inbred. She just doesn't know that yet.
Word is he has some crazy hawaiian STD
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
all I know is I'm really rwfly really really stoned and a bunch of Korean people are yelling at me
you were sat in the corner crying until someone gave you a baguette, which you then tried to feed to the duck doorstop.
I regret nothing
Well duh, alcohol and getting fucked up are the world's common languages.
Jake and I will do a protection ritual for ur dick I don't know where she has been
If you've never been pounded by an Eastern European body builder, I would highly recommend it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Seriously babe, why do I keep waking up with bruises on my nipples? WHAT ARE YOU DOING TO ME IN MY SLEEP?
Actually, scratch that, I'm not sure I want to know.
I think this bruise on my arm is actually an impression of your face
Got to work this morning and thought... Did I really dance on that pole last night
shut up and let me use my vagina as a weapon of self destruction in peace!
I think I'm pregnant again.
or as we call it, thursday.
He said when the pizza came I zip locked one slice and went to the couch and snuggled with it. Does that give you an idea of how my night was?
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