I think misery doesn't even think of me as company anymore. I'm an unofficial roommate.
Id like to know where dora the explorers parents are when she goes on all these crazy ass adventures
NoDDING MY HEAD LIKE uyuEAH MOViUNG MY HiPS LioKe YEAhhhhhhhhhhh
wow.
Just heard this lady walk by on her phone saying "did everyone orgasm?"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just heard my parents fuck. What. The. Fuck. My rooms right under theirs.. My dad barely even lasted a minute. Im almost ashamed..
In other more interesting news I'm going to arrange a surprise orgy. You in?
It was disgusting, and I would've rather licked the condensation off the windows instead, but I figured that's wasn't very ladylike
I know you are gonna wanna ask a lot of questions but when we are home I need to cover your face with deli meat and photograph it
Good news, my sex bruises are fading. Bad news, my boobs look like I have a skin disease because of it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You tried to steal my pants at 3am saying they were yours and somebody was gonna die, not cool dude
yo dude not sure how this happened but im drunk at your house eating burritos with your mom and sister. hope you're having fun in new zealand
He'd never survive you. Is there a boot camp for pre-heather training?
On a scale of 1-10 I’m at biblical violence
I missed you last night. I'm sure he will never forget the night i sang my heart will go on into his penis like a microphone
I never thought I'd be on my couch watching Star Trek, getting my tits rubbed while crying.
Randomize