great, thanks for announcing that I gave you head over twitter
at least I said it was good
Uhh, there's a legit bruise on my boob.. Again how does he manage this
Now I know he's not trying to fuck me. He took me to lunch at White Castle.
Lol okay. He's gonna show up with like a trunk of sex toys. He's like the mary poppins of hotel fucking.
Couple of things: my nipples are blue and knowing that at some point I'm going to have to poop is incredibly terrifying
THESE BITCHES NOT IN MY MAJOR BETTER NOT FILL UP MY SLAVIC FAIRYTALES CLASS
My dick was almost in plain McDonald's sight
I only see on penis in this picture but I assume there is another lurking out of sight.
Update: I may or may not be in a cult
Update #2: I may or may not be the leader of said cult
What the hell do I have to give up to manifest a dick
I just got my evaluation. My manager told me he hated my guts and pretty much wanted to stab me in the face. Then he gave me an "exceeds expectations" on pretty much everything and a raise.
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU
MANY MANY THINGS AND MOST OF THEM ARE YOUR FUCKING FAULT
I ask him how he's going, like life and stuff, and he responds "20-0 pats"
And ANOTHER guy that I once got naked is doing gay porn now. Wtf? Am I the audition?!
Everything is scary i hate being an adult i hate responsibility tell me a dick joke
Randomize
