She was the most uninteresting drunk I've met
my momz letting me make the christmas card in photoshop
so that means christmas in space?
imma make our dead cats ghosts like obi wan kenobi
everyone at work keeps looking at me like they know I got the herp this weekend
He just turned 21, it's very obvious the end of their relationship is near. Now we play the waiting game.
Nope. If I'm going to drive an hour to fuck a teacher, it will NOT be missionary thats for damn sure.
They have a booking log online so i can just check that instead of call
Technology: making bailing your sister out easier since 2008
It's raining beautiful colors and I don't know what the fuck is going on
Currently studying Econ, while waiting outside current booty call's residence for him to return from the strip club. This is your fault.
I just watch that 70s show all day and blaze whenever they do. It's nice being part of the circle
True friends don't judge, they just try to have more booty calls than you do.
You were peeing off the rooftop and told everyone sometimes you just gotta go
well I got an eye infection from a stripper motorboating me but overall it was a great weekend
That awkward moment when you realize that last night you walked from in n out to petco, bought a mouse for $3, named it mogar, taught it how to skateboard on a techdeck, made it a home out of a trash can, fed it fruity pebbles and cheese, and then forgot where you left it.
I'm eating chicken wings naked and hungover at 10am... Happy bday to me
I hit an all time low we ran out of coke and I met up with my dealer at 8 in the morning for a re-up. great customer service though.
Randomize
