Planet Earth isn't gonna get stoned and watch itself.
good thing vaginas are great cup holders
Karaoke into a bottle of boones. dear summer in alabama, glad to see you again.
she broke up with me and one of her excuses was constant soreness... should I be sad or proud?
Just bonged a beer from a vuvuzela...this place is only doing good for me
Well he's in a two year college so technically hes a senior. At least can we just pretend I'm not robbing the cradle.
She fuckin peed on me
Stay golden ponyboy
We're like Siamese twins, but joined at the genitals.
Is it inappropriate to be Drs. Willy Fister and Jess Hewill as a couples costume for Halloween?
Oh we're gynecologists
A homeless man gave him a blanket and an ambulance drove him to sarahs...
This Christmas I would like to thank Jesus for cocaine.
Em I need to know if his cum tastes like vodka. Report back.
sending my old camp counselor nudes. childhood memory win or new low?
Its not that hard to understand he's my holiday boyfriend, we ignore each other most of the year except on holidays when I give him head
You claimed that someone else had vomited underneath you/on your hand
you were very insulted that we didn’t believe you that someone else vommed
Randomize
