I would have done the walk of shame but I couldnt walk
We need to either start getting drunk more often or one of us need to start doin drugs
Wtf? Why?
I want awesome conversations to show the world.
Just thought you should know in my puerto rico drunkenness yesterday I signed my dogs name on the bar tab. cruise = success
I don't even know why im sitting in this office eating a poptart.
It smells like someone died in our apartment and ya'll used some random orifice of his body to smoke weed out of. Side note, how did we get a guitar?
I hope it's socially acceptable to wear a mesh one piece into last call tonight?
First week back and I made to one class, its gonna be okay after all.
Yes. Amanda is the only option and I want cake so I can sacrifice my vagina.
No shame December is a go.
This is literally engraved into my seat "Need crack?" And then there's a number. This isn't real.
my window is missing, there is half a pizza jammed into the disk slot of my PS3, and the entire kitchen floor is covered in cerial i cant see any wood floor. did we have fun?
I'm spending my Sunday wishing the entire Patriots offense would let me touch their manhood
you must be at least a level 5 friend to unlock my sexual orientation
He's two decades older than you. Remember how you said you wish you lived in the 70s? HE DID.
He called me khaleesi while I rode his dick. He wins
Might call you tomorrow on a drunken hate filled rant, or just a normal hate filled rant, either way be ready.
Randomize
