I thnk I just saw a monkey walking a drunk guy.
i just used a pokemon card to do blow. i need an adult. now.
I remember why I come home for the holidays. Sam Adams is the cheapest beer in the fridge
No jewlry, no bra, and no pen. I couldnt be more prepared for a friday morning class.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'd say I should re evaluate my life choices, but I'd make the same decisions only faster and wearing a push up bra.
Bunch of Navy warships just sailed into New York Harbor for Fleet Week. Nobodys getting laid this weekend.
now that I know that you did coke with your mom I can't look at her the same
I'm just so happy. I go to sleep and when I wake up there will be chocolate milk and penis.
In the middle of having sex she stopped, said "guess what, it's clitoris awareness week" and then continued fucking me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I felt kinda awkward walking into his house in nothing but lingerie and my dead grandmas overcoat
of course the one day I come to class high we have guest speakers from the police department... Just my luck
I don't need to marry the guy. I just need some filthy, shameful wish fulfillment sex and then live out the rest of my life on the bean farm.
I just quoted part of the Pokemon theme song in a sext... And it worked
roommate singing save a horse ride a cowboy wearing a cowboy hat a bikini and jeans while humping the couch.
You had blacked out Skype sex? Wow we live in the future
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