Letd wlk him
Lrtd walek hime
Lets wlk home,,,ther we go
woke up naked, spooning with wine bottle.. and my video chat was still open. fuck, not again.
It was good sex. She was screaming so much I didn't know whether or not my name was Matt or God.
I'm pretty sure he's lost all respect for me. it probably happened somewhere around the time i had officially slept with every single one of his friends..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just to save you guys the surprise, somebody shit outside of our door.
I just dropped my cookie in my glass of milk and looked at it for ten minutes. Thanks for telling me you made weed cookies.
I can't do a walk of shame with a sombrero full of baby chickens
WHY ARE YOU SMOKING WEED WHEN YOU JUST HAD A STROKE. AND MORE IMPORTANTLY WHY ARE YOU DOING IT WITHOUT ME.
Koalas always seemed like really high little puppy kittens to me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
it's taken me 3 hours to eat this pudding cup. I think I am melting.
I shall welcome him into my body with an open liver and completely lay down all chance of resistance. Sweet Zeus, please take me to Mt. Olympus and share all that is divine. I promise, the secrets will be safe with me
I'm 99% sure I just puked glitter. Wine drunk Mondays shouldn't be a thing.
Currently watching high school football on ESPN. Drink every time they say 'this kid's got potential' or 'look at this kid go' or 'atta kid' We're done for..
Getting blackout drunk infront of my family was never on my bucket list, but now that I've done it I'm cool with it.
Just shaved my balls on a moving train. By far the most dangerous stunt I've ever pulled
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