just wrote on a church. and then stalked a boy, by the way, i fucked him. him being your friend, also, love tacos.
No better way to find a friend than to offer cyber sex and see what happens
she has no idea who harrison ford is.
see that's why i'd never date someone born in the 90s
me texting you is like we have secret walkie talkies.
I googled "I hate my uterus" just to make sure I wasn't the only one.
Dude, I think my check liver light just came on
Well at one point you put icyhot on your feet because you lost your shoes and it was snowing outside.
i can tell by the sound of your bed that he isnt that good at sex.
just dropped my bong into 7 pieces, and carried the glass shards around my house. dad saw the blood dripping down my arms, and asked if i slit my wrists. way too high to laugh at this.
On the airplane today the pilot actually said "Ladies and gentlemen I'm sorry for the delay. But I know all of you have problems, and so do we..."
high enough to want to lick peanut butter off of Michael Buble's vocal chords as he serenades me.
What time do you think you'll be heterosexual?
She just told me she thinks she bruised her labia in class
I feel like I hate him but his dick too bomb to hate completely
Literally.... Guy kissing himself in mirror in this hotel elevator
Randomize
