I think the phrase "baptist college" should be an oxymoron.
you convinced the bartender to un-cut you off by letting him touch your boobs whenever you ordered a drink.
For future reference, even the most well-intentioned game of whiskey pong is a terrible idea.
I'm in new territory... I've never had to convince a guy to let me give him head as an apology.
i left the icescrapper in his bathroom. i dont remember taking it there, but i remember brushing his hair with it.
The used rubbers I threw behind her bed all semester must have landed on the baseboard heater. They went up in smoke when she turned on the heat last night.
I don’t know what's weirder; the fact that I weigh more with an erection..or the fact that I actually weighed myself with an erection...
that's all we do, eat and hve sex, eat and have sex. he thinks it's bad and that we need to talk more or whatever but I'm just not seeing the problem...
I just audibly asked myself if i wanted to masturbate.
And then audibly agreed
I just used bulldog clips for nipple clamps. Also, a wooden spoon as a paddle. DYI Domination or Ghetto Bondage?
It's funny that when I fall down as an adult I'm so much happier no one saw than that I'm not seriously hurt.
Go to the bar. Find a girl. Ask if she can cook. Tell her you have a guitar at home. Ask her if she wants to see it. Bring her home. Sleep with her. Tell her it's your birthday in the morning. Enjoy your made with lust breakfast.
I'm stuck in a tree and request your assistance ASAP
WHEN THE HELL DOES ANYTHING IN OUR LIVES *EVER* GO AS PLANNED???
Never make a coconut bikini from a real coconut.
I smell like old thai food.
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