So my shaver died while I was trimming...ya know. And now it is half way done. I don't think there's currently any aesthetic in keeping it this way...
Wow... that's disturbing man, and their not even my balls
i told you the emergency thong was a good idea.
Well the police had to intervene and I couldn't exactly feel my legs by the end of the night, but I'd say it was a successful Friday night.
My birthday was already very memorable but her punching me in the face put it over the top. I love being 25 and still not giving a fuck.
I masterbate to the thought of you. You totally aren't just a booty call.
After Madison dropped a bottle of full vodka an it shattered on the floor, it was quiet for literally 3 min straight and then drew said "the booze gods have spoken"
if you didn' use the plastic sword on the cop. maybe this wouldn't have happened.
Just retrieve me from the bathroom floor when you're done
I just saw a herd of slutty loofahs run down the street...
He used Kanye West lyrics to justify what happened and I accepted his logic
She curled up in the corner, screamed "THE BLANKET IS SO WARM" and promptly passed out with her face in the dogbed. No one bothered to reposition her.
I just spilled grey goose in my hair. You could say I keep it classy for the family Christmas parties.
I'm so proud of us for not dying.
I better get weekly incoherent text messages or I will assume something is wrong.
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