Is your delayed response due to the massive amount of judging going on?
the can pyramid on my head actually reached a decent height before I moved.
I'm not going to fuck him in his Honda Fit. That's gay.
Places you have drunkenly threatened to piss: my bed, my bros bed, my moms bed, my bros wedding
You realize at the bar last night we blew on imaginary whistles like rose from titanic right?
hes the hot one from work who thought i was dead after my party
Come on there are only so many drink coaster sizes nipples in the world
Apparently drinking in your car before going into a sales meeting is frowned upon. We are car sales men not doctors.
he was making out with her against the stove and started a fire--the thirst literally almost burned the place down!!
She wore her engagement ring the whole time we fucked. I hate her fiancee, so it was cool
It's hard not to feel like a terrible person with bruises on your tits.
My vagina just clenched in fear
Thanks for DJing my sex last night. You were on point 💜
Kids music just accidentally came on at this party. I didn't know how many stoners were here until they all sang along.
he said he couldn't believe he just lost his virginity and passed out. what have i done
Randomize
