I haven't seen him in over a year. He asked me to his prom over myspace. Is he fucking serious?
this wart on my finger ripped off while i was fingering this girl the other night. she thought she had gotten her period and started crying so i went with. its better for both of us that way
bad to tell him im pregnant over fbook chat?
Just saw a girl in a wheelchair puke then rally. Diversity matters.
I think I just made patron unclassy I bought limes at a gas station and for salt we are using gas station packets of salt
I was thinking of baby names while I was giving him a blow job
That would explain his violent outburst while watching barefoot contessa...
Can you do me a favor and fuck someone with a car so I can get a ride home?
There is a guy dressed as Captain America in the theatre. I want to make out with him even though I have no idea what he looks like. Wish me luck, I'm going in.
Nothing says male bonding like watching porn with your grandpa
Also I would love to pregame at your place if I weren't stuck at mine drinking laxatives
Like, what do you do with girlfriends? Buy her dinner and just like leave?
My liver is preforming stress tests.
It was a strange night. I made out with his college roommate and said "do you care?" beforehand.
it's like the easy bake oven version of plastic surgery
Randomize
