If she sees it and stops hooking up w/ me then you owe me
Your lack of a response has proven you've clearly forgotten how crazy I am.
What are you doing? Did I punch you in the face last night?
Nothing will ever prepare you for the moment when you are sitting on your friends bathroom floor with no pants on eating string cheese & pita at 2am.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm in Burlington Coat Factory. This place'd be great if you were on E. There're so many textures...
I'm kinda hoping that if I rub the right object, a genie will come out
On the one year anniversary of me loosing my virginity... thousands of people will be taking their pants of on subways all around the world
It's like a tribute to you being a slut
be ready to rage tomorrow. like naked ranch dressing rage
can't blv i tried using a "backpack" as a unit of measurement...i drank a lot of beer last night
I'm still getting random messages from guys about my Halloween outfit. Electrical tape is coming back next year
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He used one of his curtains as a leash and hand restraints. He wins the creative sex challenge hands down.
pls come tAke this super bath no romo it's just. so nice.
I can't believe I haven't fucked an Elvis impersonator yet.
I'm sharing a breakfast burrito w my uber driver
Just let me pee on you and I'll leave you alone.
sometime during the night he found me in the empty hotttub singing marvins room in only my bra.
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