I haven't seen him in over a year. He asked me to his prom over myspace. Is he fucking serious?
I think I know how big ted kennedy's penis is.
We pay for beer, you give birth. It's how the world works.
he just invited me over for the 3 p's...pepsi pizza and porn...I'm gonna marry him
she just walked in and said "well, I got peed on again"...
the only thing coherent you said from what i saw of you is when you were throwing up, i asked if you were done and you just "uh huh you know what it is"
Found him fucking some random drunk chick in the bathrrom at the blue lep with a beer in each hand. had to give him props.
The cougar has a calendar on her wall of when she can give topless handjobs again. I pity her husband.
So wait. Let me get this straight lol... you... are are considering offering fetish services to "trample and own" someone for $80 in order to pay for someone to come organize ur shit? Pure genius.
But college guys get to crossfade so there's that
No idea what that is
Like getting bent? When you drink and smoke together...
I'm 30 stop using your cool kids words
so i ran into nick. i may be more gay than anticipated
Where the condoms are as broken as my dreams
You know what the worst feeling in the world is? Sitting in your 6pm AA meeting still hungover from the night before
My crotch smells like fire and I can't find my pants
True I am eskimo brothers with every one of my room mates, but it was only two girls. And 9 outta 10 times I was first
Randomize
