from now on my penis is your penis
porn bloobers exist! never have i laughed so hard while jerking off!
Life lesson: using the oven as a heater= $500 electric bill
She keeps stunt undies in her bag, 2 sizes too small. She leaves them behind so the guy thinks he was luckier than he was...
How did you get the entire couch up on it's side and into the bathroom?
Never again. I promise. My old gay body can't handle that much adrenaline twice.
What was the name of that place where we saw that concert? It was like a warehouse and some guy was living in the loft above the stage...
It's called: a legit place to drop acid.
I really wanted to suck your dick, but I also didn't want to miss any of the movie
I think we need to have a day of drinking in classes. I know we don't share any, but sacrifices need to be made.
Seriously can I go through one convo where masturbating doesn't come up
yeah I woke up in jail with two different shoes on and neither of them were mine
My hot gay tattoo artist grew a beard and I'm not taking it well.
I AHVE A WINE BUCKETTTTTTT
The laundromat is nothing like In the pornos
You just sent a mass text asking if anyone ever drank the blood of a goat in the glorious name of Satan...after that we confiscated any writing utensil
Randomize
