Can one do a walk of shame from one's own hotel? Considering I just barfed in a planter down town in from of a bunch of business men in suits on my way to a work breakfast on a Wednesday morning, I am gonna just go with yes.
I wish my period boobs were my regular boobs.
Be here at 3:30. We'll find out how much beer can fit in a Mini Cooper.
She was drinking straight whiskey out of her peacock shaped vase again.
The first thing they saw when they walked in was all four of our std test's hangin on the fridge....i'd be worried if they didn't think we were sluts
I tried to fuck this guy who I'm pretty sure has an erectile dysfunction
he called us the olsen twins. we also rapped ignition much to his dismay.
It's my vagina- remember its magical and yes I just did mini spirit fingers
I'm not sure what exactly you were planning, but you kept yelling that we were going to need a lot of midgets and a lawyer.
It's just great that Easter is on 4/20 this year. Now everyone can enjoy the Easter egg hunts. And being around my whole family.
Your birthday is now over. Your day in the spotlight has dimmed and now you're as special as everyone else. The world goes back to revolving around me. Good night.
so at 3am I stumbled into my parents house and crawled into bed with them, I need to start dating.
Emily saved me from being trapped on my roof and then I beat her in a race at 5am it was a low key night
Dude, the worst part is I can't even pretend it didn't happen because she posted a video of it on Facebook.
We could have fun in a cardboard box. Think of the damage we could do at an amusement park!
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