I feel miserable, can't drink that much when I go out
We've been saying that since '98
dear life, i get it, drinking is not a contest
I have before 2 am pics and after 2am pics, which do you want to see first?
my brother is about to go smoke a joint outside... he's preparing his munchies on the counter beforehand. I admire his responsibility.
I managed to lose everything but my socks.. which stayed on all 6 times we had sex.
He went around feeding all the high kids pretzels. He's like their god now
I just found a video on my phone from last night of you yelling, "you can't fuck me!" at least 20 times
The dingo escaped by eating a hole through my screen door. It's loose in the city somewhere.
Those titties aren't worth a lifetime of listening to her talk about gluten free yams and japanese manga.
In a strange taxi 3059. Battery dying I'm dying. Bye.
Just had a shirt made that says "I'm sorry" going to wear it every sat and sun morning for the foreseeable future
Like he and the nurses kept being so persistent with it and I just wanted to run out of there in my backless gown and yell FUCK OFF BITCHES IM OUT
How much weed can I reasonably smoke now if I have to leave for work in a bit over an hour
Nana added me on facebook...i think i'll have to call her and warn her about my lifestyle before i confirm her as a friend.
I hate when I'm sexting and I make a typo.
You just killed the sext mood.
Randomize
