Just mADE A PArabola og urine
I promise you 4 toothbrushes taped together and lube does not do the trick
Lady GaGa only went backwards in convincing me she's not a man at the VMAs.
He told me to pretend to be a shark, and he would slay me with his harpoon cock.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My mom is such a hoarder. I found a deer candelabrum last night, it had antlers has candle holders. It was like a redneck menorah.
What's the protocol for seeing the two girls you've been sleeping with in the store WHILE buying condoms?
3some
You're right, stupid question.
I just bought a vibrating toothbrush with my parents FSA insurance card because I'm too broke for a vibrator. New.Level.Of.Low.
My roommate made me go home after I mooed at fat girls at the gas station.
Sorry you called when I was puking in a cheetos bag
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
get back quick. that 17 year old who peed on your car wants to do shots.
The 12 year old son winked and made eyes at me while his father fed me vodka gummy bears. Gameday yo
I'm sorry about all of the innappropriate shoe throwing
I climaxed at the same time the bass dropped. I think it's safe to say I've reached enlightenment
I'm not real sure what dinosaurs sound like, but dude, she made dinosaur noises.
can we drink soon
I'm not sure who this is but I'm free tomorrow night
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