oh my god. my mom just found my pipe. she thought it was a dildo.
like i said, there should be a sitcom about your family.
He was eating me out on the dryer...and his mom walked in with her laundry basket...
He wasn't the only one with a full load.
What's the point in getting all dressed up and going when i'm just gonna throw up on myself by midnight?
i crushed up some extenze and put them in his protein powder - should make for an interesting gym experience
yeah, he just sent me a picture of himself with his shirt off.... It didnt turn me on, it just made me want to buy him a big mac....
And I was somehow convinced to wash the glassware at the bar topless.
just saw someone in just a bathrobe not even tied shut run to the bathroom with a facefull of cum. Someone had a good night
Hypothetically going to the gym on coke was a good idea
I now have a GPA requirement for guys I hookup with more than once.
Why the fuck is he under my phone as Papi Chulo?
Not only did she fulfill a life long dream of mine of banging in a library, she bought me subway for lunch. I feel like I got the best gold star ever today.
You know the party's good when you say "Never have I ever caused an emergency landing" and someone drinks
As much as I want you to bang someone other than me, he is an asshole.
I'm seriously considering selling my books back early. I don't use them anyways and I could really use the beer money..
I know her cup size but not her name....
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