PS the last 3 guys I've hooked up with were a CEO, a mechanical bull operator and a magic the gathering player...I need a type...
Ur type is ready and willing
They should make Glad Forceflex condoms.
I just made a milkshake without a blender... thats determination
Everything is fine now . The coast guard said we just can't take the inflatable trampling out past the break way anymore
I can motorboat myself in this new push-up bra. I need to go out tonight.
I woke up to you singing What Makes You Beautiful and trying to blend an avocado with vodka.
Shower sex is an art that should not be attemted drunk
Yeah. I made eggs in a microwave. I think that's an accomplishment this week, MOM.
We hooked up last night. I think it was great for our friendship.
I'm glad you had fun with your genitals.
Ok well my life just seems more exciting by default because I'm dating my married boss and sexting with my ex
I mean, I was expecting a little more coke snorting and a little less kids and cake
I thought it turned out lovely. You got to see me almost naked and I got to be stoned to the point I was content with
Wtf when were you almost naked??
I should've known a straight guy wouldn't know all the words to Moana
It may be a corded vibrator from the 90s but it gets the job DONE
Randomize
