Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(773): View more from Illinois

Prereq for being on nyc prep: money, bitchy, and a lazy eye... if only you were rich

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(716): View more from New York

i bet even starving children in Africa take the crust off their poptarts

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(978): View more from Massachusetts

please stop referring to my baby as "your little fucker"

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(512): View more from Texas

its 9am and we're in an escalade. I have no shoes and my dress is on backwards. I feel like we're the morning after a rap video

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Stay Away From These 29 Online Dating Red Flags
Read it at the TFLN blog
(216): View more from Ohio

I've got my laundry in the car, tonights 1 night stand pre-req is an in suite washer and dryer. Let's do this!

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(555): View more from

After 2 hrs of driving around looking for him, we just found him sleeping in the bed of my truck with the cover closed, cuddling with the spare tire.

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(724): View more from Pennsylvania

Just remember that she is a giant dick-sucking forehead and you are better than that.

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(406): View more from Montana

1. Why did we have the team Chirstmas party in November 2. Why didn't anyone tell me the coaches were invited 3. Why did coach get the giant vibrator I brought

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(720): View more from Colorado

I've just had my first cup of coffee in a month and I moaned at the first drink and honestly I think this is the most sexual expreiance in 6 months

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