you called to congratulate me on being the reason you lost never have i ever
dinner with the girl I motorboated last semester wasn't as awkward as I thought it would be
I imagine the nuva ring like a bug zapper. It just kills them all.
just saw a couple drunkenly stumble over to the family planning aisle of Walgreens. inspiring.
im not 100% but im pretty sure at some point i was rubbing ur bf's beard telling him how magnificient i thought it was
The cop was more concerned with the fact I had cowboy boots on with shorts than the fact we were under age
I feel like this is going to result in some sort of tearing in my vagina.
Thats a chance were just gonna have to take
He's going to let me keep his bowl in my car. Does that make us Facebook official?
I want to get so drunk, you will need subtitles to understand me. Rough week.
Its okay that he doesn't remember you, he only remembers girls by their boobs and I think you were wearing a jacket
There should be an open time period where you show each other your goods and it's totally socially acceptable to bail.
I wholeheartedly concur
I lost the right to judge tonight
Your shirt... Was in my pants
I just told my bowl "sorry" for putting it down, because I thought I hurt its feelings. omg. I'm high.
he told me I was hypnotizing him with my mouth so I guess I do give good head
Randomize
