I love the "adulterer" look on you. It's hot.
Its part of my fall instant classic line.
i just heard one Asian kid say to another, "i bet if i could get into Harvard i could get laid all the time, my brother lost his virginity the first night there."
After a valiant attempt at golf, I think it's time for Tiger to go back to doing what he does best- having sex w/ blond, white women.
We all know tonight is going to end like every other night with you. drunk, pantless and confused. Dont try to switch things up.
You're about to fuck a guy with a sweatshirt tied around his waist like a mensurating 13 year old. Get your priorities straight, you're graduating tomorrow.
You can't mix blow jobs, bacon, and Star Wars.
A) just did. And b-z) that sounds like a great Sunday morning.
Is 28 too old to get fingered in Centennial Park? Asking for a friend.
Bought a gym bag tonight. Used it to bring my Taco Bell in the house.
I think all three of us just need to suck it up and go to lunch with him to keep our bar tab down
I'm pretty sure the rest of my evening will consist of masturbating, drinking tequila and watching children's movies.
the only things my left hand does: catch/hold things and masturbation.
I mean it's up to you where you want to sleep but I'm telling you you're going to hear us have sex no matter what room you're in.
Fair enough
Just got hit on via LinkedIn..do I capitalize on this opportunity/land a job or reply something sassy
Is it bad that I'm not at all bothered by the fact that to some people I'm simply known as the girl that takes her shirt off?
I think its a little fucked up she invited you to her wedding, are you going?
There is a lot of acid in my drugs right now
....ill put you down as a no then
Randomize
