Remember that sex scene from American Psycho?
Ya, why?
We should try that some time.
Night out in new white coat = success. Offered free breast exams all night, two took me up on it, woke up with one. I love medical school!!!
I had fun this weekend too. According to Web MD, my symptoms say I had a miscarriage.
Couple in the hotel room next to me keep fucking. When I hear her get close I call the room wait for them to stop and hang up. If I'm not getting any tonight then no one should.
he passed out at 11 at a party. he deserved to be stripped down an duct taped to the floor
Most sexually ambiguous night of my life. Kept switching from the NBA finals to the Tonys.
I'd bet your vomit would be flammable at this point. Can I try to light it?
We wouldn't be friends if you didn't.
Oh damn. God have mercy on everything w a dick in a ten mile radius.
You made me pull over because you thought a leaf was a twenty rolling across the road.
Hey I was just wondering if you could go look for my teeth?
So do you remember the bartender that caught me when I fell off the bar 4 weeks ago? He hasn't been to work since...Woops.
Say whatever you bloody well like; you don't know the true meaning of life until you have smoked to a Sade cd.
My mom just asked if I've gotten any girls pregnant how is your day going
I puked in the back of my mom's new car because I had too much to drink at Chilis. I think I just hit rock bottom.
So high that I just walked into class, late, sat down in my desk, and tried to buckle my seatbelt.
Randomize
