now everythime i write "i'm" in my phone my tap9 spells out "i'm-never-drinking-again". It's trying to remind me
remind me to tell you what i found stuck to me this morning
He yelled IN THE FACE!! while cumming on my face.
Haha its ok. When we got back you sat in the car and attempted to tell me in sign language you were blacked out lol
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
But Monday we'll be living in a post-apocalyptic hellscape. Also, I'm going to a champagne tasting.
How is it that you get into at least one taco related fight a year?
So update from last night: I made friends with a coke dealer, I tore the card scanner off the wall of my dorm, and I passed out on our bathroom counter with my head in the sink.
It's a little sad/awesome that I scored coke within 60 seconds of walking in the bar.
The student becomes the teacher.
He gave me a script of norcos and touched my balls so overall it's been a good day.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I will consider today a failure if my nipple isn't bitten at least 😂
Oh is THAT how we're gonna play mini golf
Oh man I missed being single! Two different guys just sent me dick pics during my kid’s little league game.
He saw me naked after our first date and still asked for a second.. so I think we’re doing good
Apparently last night I was doing back bends for the guy making my easy mac because clearly it wasn't easy enough for me.
we're tipping the strippers with chocolate coins.
Do you remember what happened last night? All I could find we're phone numbers of strip clubs in Detroit. Did we go to Detroit?
Randomize