I don't think your that much of a whore. your like a whore-let. a mini whore.
I just saw a girl play flip cup with only her tongue
I'm in love
You wanted to speak to the manager of mcdonalds as to why a "bag of cheeseburgers" isn't a menu option.
Lindsay lohan: road to jail is on E tonight. Bring vodka we are not missing an opportunity to make a drinking game out of this
she named each of the players on the last ten madden covers in order and then shotgunned 2 beers...if she doesnt have a penis im in love
Thanks for letting me use your ID, there's $120 along with your ID in the mail to cover the Urinating in public fine I got last night....sorry
I hate to stick you with the friend but I did all the work.
So when's a good time this week to show up at your apartment in nothing but a trench coat and a bow? Y'know. Hypothetically.
Please don't call my dad a fuckpuppet, I feel like that would be awkward to explain later.
Like how hard is it to come up to me with chocolate and wine and say "hey, you're beautiful. Wanna marathon Doctor Who in sweatpants?" Hell yes!
Sending a pic of labia to send to the TN Legislator. Obviously they don't think I know what to do with it so I'm gonna ask them for advice.
My frontal lobe is being piloted by Jack Daniels right now.
Twist bend and done? Jesus that sounds like a seventh grade hand job.
The car smells like weed is an understatement.
Sorry didnt text you yesterday. had to put restraining order on my ex.
Randomize