I just saw a license plate that said "Guidete" at college. This proves the world is officially ending in 2012
Shit sorry. Maybe I wont give you this sweet ass fanny pack I found in my parents attic
I want to apologize 3 days in advance for what's about to take place on St. Patrick's day.
a kid who worked there came up to me and let me know you were sitting in the bathroom sink. he said it was fine, so i just kept checking on you.
I just bought 4 bottles of wine in sweats at 530 on a monday night. Fuck law school
I just keep sniffing it hoping for an explanation.
I dunno. It's not as good as 'devourer of cocks' but I suppose few things are.
Carry on my wayward bro, there'll be beer when you get low. lay your neon tank to rest, dont you rage no more.
I said I was going to sleep an hour ago. Now I'm making plans to get high with the guy who mows your lawn.
I still can't believe that I ate McDonald's off of my chest in his bed...
Cross faded me is not the classiest.
No not at all haha I wish there was a picture of that
He called us the '3 Amigos' and told us if hos ex wife came we had to jump the porch railing and hide in the bushes.
Finally met a man who appreciates my beer pong skills, definitely a keeper for the weekend
Who the fuck gets injured on a merry-go-round? HOW IS IT POSSIBLE??
Hypothetically, I throw a party and my ex-boyfriend and my current fuck buddy are in the same house... what should I do?
How many beds are in the house? Hypothetically...
Good thing he's hot and my vagina likes him or I'd be at Dennys right now.
Randomize
